A Taste of IVF Over 40

Archive for May 2008

Ah well.  It’s back to the clinic for me.  I got my period today.  Thank you so much for your support.  It means the world to me.

Negative HPTsOh Well.  Can you blame me?  I can’t help but want to know.  I am behaving strangely and I don’t care.  I stayed in bed for an extra hour and a half this morning just because I didn’t want to test.  It was another negative.  These Pregnow tests are really cheap ($1 each) and test 10mIU/ml of HCG.  My blood test is Monday.

Unless my doctor advises against it, I will be stimulating again as soon as possible.  I don’t have the luxury of time.  In my current frame of mind every month is ‘wasted time’.  Sick I know.  I’ve gotta get out of the doldrums and live my life.  Especially for my husband, bless him.  I think he feels like he’s married to a cardboard box lately (or should I say an empty carton of eggs!  Ha ha – I thought that was funny but no-one else is supposed to laugh).

Plan B: In Australia, we don’t have an egg donor program; you have to find your own egg donor.  My sister mentioned that her 22 year-old daughter may donate eggs to me and that I should consider asking her.  Blimey.  That’s one hell of a Plan B.

It has now been nine days since my eggs were collected and fertilised.  Seven days since the embryos were transferred. 

I tested this morning with a home pregnancy test … negative.  It was a very senstive test (10). 

I will test again tomorrow morning, and the next day, because I am obsessed (but cheerful) 🙂

Yet, apprehensive …

It’s a bit of an emotional roller-coaster.

My egg pickup on Saturday went well – I had 11 eggs – yay!  I was over the moon.

I turned up for my embryo transfer this morning to find that only two eggs had made it as far as four-celled embryos.  Devastated. 

Well, those two champions were transferred by my very nice doctor and are now inside me.  I was so shocked by the news that I couldn’t even hang around and speak to him about what happened.  I almost fled out of the consulting room when he was finished, holding back tears.  It was such a revolting feeling to walk out via the waiting room where plenty of other women were eagerly anticipating their transfers, and of course, I held my red eyes low as I assumed they would look at me wondering why I was bothering in the first place … at my age.

I can’t help but think that if nine of my eggs were so bad then why should these two that I’ve got inside me limp along any further than about eight cells.  The truth is that I’ve left it too late.  My good eggs have just about run out.

So much for the birth control pill.  So much for the high hormone dose.  So much for the acupuncture.  Aargh.

I have my Border Collie at my feet whilst typing this.  The kitten is on my desk hitting the buttons with me – very difficult to type straight :). 

The bright side is that I have two embryos inside me.  I have hope, a wonderfully supportive husband (the first thing he said was “Well, if this doesn’t work honey we can try again straight away”), and I have prayers.

I promise my next post will be happy and positive.  Like I said earlier … this will be my month!

Ha ha!  The kitten got too inquisitive about the Border Collie sleeping under the desk and FELL OFF the edge of the desk ONTO HIM!  What a calamity!  

Here are our two pets! 

William our Border CollieTabatha my Ragdoll Kitten

William is the ever-responsible, insanely jealous dog and Tabatha is the new kitten who just wants to make friends.  We love them to bits!

Today’s scan revealed I have eight mature follicles and four little ones.  I will have my eggs collected this weekend.  I checked and the same sperm donor we used last time is still available so we’ll be using him again (a real-life angel). 

I thought I’d write down what my current views are on the following:

Acupuncture and IVF: Well, you know I haven’t done a full course of acupuncture; I only started three weeks ago.  However, so far so good.  My follicle count has improved – would you believe it is actually higher than when I first did IVF in my early 30’s.  However, one could remain sceptical when one takes a look at how well(?) my digestive system has been behaving since receiving acupuncture.  My digestive system has been behaving very *interestingly*, and my appetite has completely disappeared.  Great if I was trying to lose weight but, according to my acupuncturist, very, very bad if you are trying to have lots of energy for growing healthy eggs.  Also, I have no IVF whore-moane symptoms.  No bloating and not a single cramp, pain or headache … Is this the acupuncture?

Three Month Break with Birth Control Pill:  This caused me such angst.  I was ever so worried that my last few fertile months are being filled with wasted time, by going on the pill for almost a month.  However, this could well be an attributor to the above positive outcome with the follicle count.  Although one must remember that this is precisely what I did last time when I only got six follicles.  I think next time I will actually be a lot calmer about taking the BCP.

Limit of Two Embryos Transferred for Over 40’s: This stinks.  In Australia, the story is that you can only have two embryos transferred.  Full stop.  This is a good policy to save having triplets.  But really.  What are my chances of triplets?  I’m using my own 40 year-old eggs!!  My IVF doctor disagrees; he thinks that it is possible I could become pregnant with triplets using my own eggs.  Well, we both have our own opinions.  We can agree to disagree and then we’ll do what he says we are going to do :-).  Regardless, I think it’s out of his hands.

Introducing new Kittens to 7-year-old Border Collies:  What a catastrophe.  William is soooo jealous.  Tabatha just wants to be friends but he hates her.  He pretends to like her but he snapped at her last night.  BAD DOG!  Oh well, it is still early days.  My opinion?  Get them both together when they are babies!  Cutie-pie photos coming soon!

OK I now know why I don’t have any symptoms.  My follicles, even though I have been on 450 iu of Gonal-F for several days, are only very small.  I have to take the injections for a few more days.  I’ll have another scan on Tuesday.  The good news is that I have 10 follicles forming.  That’s better than the six follicles last time.  Let’s hope they stay put.

The best news is that I have my kitten!  Her name is Tabatha.  She is gorgeous.  She is making me feel better.0——————————-p. 8888888888888888888888888u/999999999990000000009.  He he, Tabatha just walked across my keyboard.

The Synarel nasal spray is being particularly easy on me; I’ve had no headaches at all.  The 450 iu Gonal-F injections are pretty uneventful.  Argh.  Does this mean that they’re not working?  Well … thoughts like that do run through my mind! 

I am bracing myself for the bad news.  Yeah, I know it’s not very good positive-thinking but it’s called self-defence.

I’ll pick up my new kitten in a coupla days!  Yay!  Then I’ll stick up a photo of my Border Collie (William) and my Ragdoll (Tabatha)!  William is 7 years old and Tabatha is a 15 week old seal-point.  Oh, it is going to feel good to play with a little one of my own and hold it in my arms, even if it’s just a cat.